Posts by Matthew Millham


Pop Cult

Waste Of Time Videos You Have To See

Written by
Matthew Millham

Comments: 1

The WTF meter just got pegged. The time taken to make these ridiculous videos could have been better spent knocking off liquor stores or collecting spare foreskins. And yet we can’t look away. In a clearly biased move we picked our own Matt Millham’s Baby Soccer World Cup as the winner.

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New Feature: Dance Lessons With Elvis Jr.

Written by
Matthew Millham

Image via Renée Stevens

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As a kid I tried out a lot of different hobbies before finding something I liked enough to stick with. Legos, Etch-a-Sketch, binge drinking – none did it for me. Thankfully I found disc golf, and my life hasn’t been the same since.

But not all kids like Frisbees. Some prefer boomerangs. Or womanizing. Or Elvis.

Some really like Elvis. Some like him so much that they spend their free time dressing up and singing sort of like the King (for the record, I’ve never dressed as, or sang like, a Frisbee). Handshake spent a couple days with a half dozen little Elvi at the Lake George Elvis Festival in Lake George, NY. You have to really like your hobby to travel across the country or an international border to do it. And you have to have a really loving family, or an insane stage mom, to ferry you around to these gigs. Here’s a Handshake tribute to the dedicated kids.

Check our full story on these Kid Kings in the September issue of Handshake magazine.

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Dance Lessons With Elvis Jr.

Written by
Matthew Millham

Image via Renée Stevens

Comments: --

As a kid I tried out a lot of different hobbies before finding something I liked enough to stick with. Legos, Etch-a-Sketch, binge drinking – none did it for me. Thankfully I found disc golf, and my life hasn’t been the same since.

But not all kids like Frisbees. Some prefer boomerangs. Or womanizing. Or Elvis.

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Some Powerful Shit

Written by
Matthew Millham

Image via Megan Swann

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If you’ve never been to cow country, you might not be familiar with the wacky things farmers do with the tons of crap that plops onto fields across America every day. Poo clocks. Poo trivets. Poo chucking contests. Honestly, though, this stuff is all pretty worthless, never mind gross. What’s next, a baby crib made from caribou crap?

Besides, why waste a turd on a trivet when it can be used for something worthwhile, such as powering your PlayStation.

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Now Serving: Lord of the Rings, Live

Written by
Matthew Millham

Photo by Matthew Millham

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Handshake just returned from a three-day military embed with Ragnarok, the biggest live-action boffer battle game in the U.S. of A. This isn’t D&D live. It is a real-life butt kicking with soft(ish) weapons wielded by people who love to hit and be hit.

It is anything but bloodless. Its participants anything but shy. We’ve seen more bare nipples the past three days than Madonna’s had boyfriends.

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Iran Struggles To Decipher New Media

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Matthew Millham

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Iran upped its ante in the propaganda war over a supposedly kidnapped Persian nuclear scientist Tuesday when it posted a webcam video made, the Islamic Republic claims, by its captive atomic brainchild.

Who was it that said that puns are the lowest form of comedy? He was wrong. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad jokes are the new low. They’re just too easy.

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Handshake hangs with Elvis, Elvis, and Elvis

Written by
Matthew Millham

Photo by Matthew Millham

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Saturday morning cartoons lost a bit of their luster today. Instead of crashing out in front of the TV with a box of Lucky Charms, Handshake got up early to watch a parade of vehicle-borne Elvis impersonators roll down Lake George, NY’s main drag. Most of those who got up to watch the parade with us were old enough to have seen the King live. Unfortunately, we haven’t been around that long.

But neither are the people we’re tailing around town this weekend.

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Sprechen Sie Deutsch, Robot? Austrian Robots Strut Their Stuff In Dance Competition

Written by
Matthew Millham

Comments: 2

Juilliard would be so much more awesome if its dancers were robots. But they’re not. That’s why Handshake thinks Austria will replace New York as the center of dance awesomeness. The Upper Austria Center of Applied Sciences not only offers bachelor’s and master’s degrees that include curricula in robot engineering, it hosts an annual Hexapod Robot […]

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Pomplamoose Takes Another Poke At Big Music

Written by
Matthew Millham

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Pomplamoose, a California duet with a houseful of instruments, a video camera, and some really sick editing skills, popped out another of their catchy, free videosongs this week.

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Three Hundred Miles to Bust: Handshake Takes On Pai Gow

Written by
Matthew Millham

Image via gail m tang on Flickr

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Here’s something to file under “do as I say, not as I do”: Don’t drive 300 miles to play Pai Gow at a Connecticut casino without first understanding at least the basics of the game.

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